Dial down your stress and stand in your power with the help of your favorite life coach in Dallas! Holiday boundaries are extra tough because most people aren’t used to setting boundaries to begin with. The stress and expectations of the holidays seems to put a magnifying glass on toxic behavior and outdated patterns where boundaries are most needed.
If you struggle with people pleasing or perfectionism, or if you have family members who operate out of trauma, you might find boundary setting to be more of a challenge. It’s by no means impossible with the right tools. I invite you to consider applying for a complimentary consultation to take a closer look at the people pleasing, perfectionism and unhealthy family patterns this month so that you can feel more confident setting boundaries during the holidays. Dallas, TX is where I call home, but you can live anywhere and coach with me!
How To Say No During The Holidays
I know, you feel like you’re doing the right thing by saying yes to everything and putting everyone else’s needs before your own. You think you’re going with the flow and maybe even getting people to like you, but really you’re people pleasing (which by the way is a form of manipulation…let that sink in for a moment) and burning yourself out.
This year let’s try a new approach – when you’re asked to do something or you’re invited to an event, pause, and ask yourself these questions:
Is this something I even want to do?
Do I have the energetic capacity to do this?
Am I only saying yes out of perceived obligation or am I saying yes because this feels like something I’d enjoy?
Allow yourself to answer these questions from a place of real honesty.
When you decide to respectfully decline an invitation or request, remember that less is more. You do not need to explain yourself or justify your decision. A simple ‘Thank you so much for the invite, I won’t be able to make it, have a great time!’ is enough. Really. Take it from someone who has coached hundreds of people as a Dallas Life Coach. Holiday stress will be relieved the less you justify and the more you protect your energy (and your calendar).
Say No To Things You’ll Regret Later
Over spending and over eating are easy traps to fall into during the holidays. Take a moment to get clear on how you want to approach your budget and your eating habits before the hustle and bustle begins. If you’re clear on how you want to feel when you look at your credit card statement or when you put on your favorite pair of jeans, you’ll begin to find the will power that is required to resist temptation and be true to yourself.
You’ve learned that less is more when it comes to saying no, and if you’re wondering how to handle holiday stress when it comes to the sticky subjects of money and food, here are a few tips:
- Script out what you are going to say in advance
- Use ‘I feel’ statements such as ‘No thank you, I don’t feel good when I eat that’
- Suggest a price limit on gifts or throw out the idea of doing Secret Santa saying something like ‘I feel like we could all benefit from less pressure on gifts and our wallets this year, let’s make it easy and fun!’
It’s easy to get caught up in the moment, so the advance planning and scripting will really come in handy.
Healthy Relationships Over The Holidays
Unfortunately happy occasions like weddings and Thanksgiving can often bring out the ugly side of family dynamics. If you’re wanting to have stress-free holidays, looking at your part in your family patterns is essential.
It may feel impossible not to react when your crazy uncle starts talking politics over dinner, and this is why personal growth coaching during the holiday season is so important. I help my clients to extract their past pain and to learn how to be unbothered, keeping their energy in the place they want it to be regardless of what’s going on around them.
To get more information about how to navigate complex family dynamics over the holidays, check out this blog post.
Holiday Stress Management Dallas Life Coach
If you’re tired of not enjoying the holidays and want to take a closer look at what is preventing you from doing that, let’s talk. The work you do now will benefit you forever, not just during the holiday season.
I truly wish you all a lovely, relaxing Thanksgiving filled with football, peaceful conversations and gratitude as well as a very Merry Christmas that feels like magic, not chaos and stress.
